When two wheels engage, great care is taken so that the cogs of each wheel firmly interlock in such a way that no damage is done to either wheel. In this way, greater tasks can be accomplished, and the purpose for which the wheels were made is carried out. Something similar, hopefully, begins during the period of engagement, and continues throughout the marriage, as two people “engage” each other more fully. To help with that process, the following guidelines have been set down.

• From the time the engaged couple contacts the parish to the proposed wedding day, at least a six (6) month period is required. (As soon as engagement is proposed, it is wise to contact the parish, even if that happens a year or more before the anticipated date of marriage.)
  
• The date requested is a tentative reservation. The couple and priest/deacon will arrive at a decision to proceed with plans if and when there are no obstacles to the marriage.
  
• The FOCCUS inventory, normally administered at the parish, allows the couples to compare answers to statements dealing with topic areas important to married life. It is to be used for each couple seeking marriage. Couples seeking validation after a civil ceremony are urged to use the REFOCCUS instrument.
  
• The parish in which the marriage is taking place decides what formal marriage preparation programs will satisfy the diocesan requirements for marriage preparation. This will normally include the parish or regional program, and may include, as an alternative, the diocesan-based Engaged Encounter weekend. PLEASE NOTE: Because of the popularity of the Engaged Encounter Weekend, couples who wish to attend should register as far in advance of their wedding date as possible.
  
• Times with a priest/deacon for dealing with issues pertinent to the couple, such as collecting the necessary certificates and Church legal papers, and planning for the wedding ceremony itself, will also be needed.
  
• For persons who will be under 19 at the time of their marriage, an interview with a Catholic Charities counselor is required before plans can proceed. If this is true for you, please discuss this situation with the priest or deacon handling the arrangements. Sometimes a temporary delay is needed if difficulties surface

For further information, contact your parish priest or deacon, or:

Center for Family Ministry
402 S. Independence Blvd.
Romeoville, IL 60446-2264
(815) 838-5334
familyministry@dioceseofjoliet.org